From my writer’s notebook yesterday:
Today I came across an old mini-golf score card from when I beat Andy. (This doesn’t happen very often, so I stuck it in my very first writer’s notebook in order to remember.) Like a whoosh from opening a bottle of pop, I was flooded with feelings of how things used to be.
Following whims. Carefree. Aloof. Donuts for dinner. Runs with Sascha.
I slept more. I thought I needed it.
Happy times, but not complete.
Now, well now, I have to be more responsible. Now I have to plan ahead. Now we have to be intentional about being together, like playing mini-golf . . . and why in the world would we ever play it without our kids?
Less than three years ago we were just two. Now we’re five. And it takes a lot to remember life as just two. I need to spend more time remembering how things used to be.
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Ruth, you are so right – I do need to remember more. As I watch my fifteen year old freshman continue to grow, I keep mentally grabbing at moment. Tonight, I took him to get his hair cut; no big deal. Yet, I savored his thoughts as he shared about wrestling practice and math class and his biology presentation. I hold him – in my mind’s arms like the babe so long ago. E. and T. are the same. I love them tons, and each day I have to remind myself to savor the moment, even if it’s just making breakfast. I’m remembering.
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