It is 10:57. I just got home and my bones are tired. Why am I facing a computer screen and writing, even though I left the house at 6:15 am, led writing workshop in four classrooms, joined two teachers in reflective practice meetings, planned a writing celebration, started a new book study with a group of primary teachers, walked forty minutes for exercise, drove 150 miles, went to a doctor’s appointment, received 5 books in the mail, visited with my mom at the library, received 221 email messages, 6 text messages, 12 phone calls, and 2 voice mails today, stopped for gummy worms on the way home, played trains, attended the high school musical with Becca, was hugged hugged hugged by “our” drama kids (the kids who are now seniors, but began acting in the middle school plays Becca & I directed), showered, stretched, and poured a glass of water, unpacked my bag, plugged in my computer, and told myself I will write?
I will write.
The habit is too important to break. The challenge is close to being completed and if sixty other slicers wrote today, I can too. I’m addicted to the rush of mashing words together in powerful ways. Being a writer is about collecting words, even when it is hard to find the time. I don’t just want to like the idea of being a writer. It is more than a romantic, feel-good notion. For me, being a writer is finding the time to put words on the page, doing it even when I don’t feel like it, regardless of if I feel it is good enough or worthy enough or even if anyone is going to respond to it.
I will write for me. I want to believe in myself. I want to know I can do the things I set my mind to do. I want to know I’m not too busy in the midst of this life.
I will write for me. (I’ll revise for others.)
Discover more from TWO WRITING TEACHERS
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.
I love how you share the ups and downs of writing. I also enjoyed seeing the different types of sentences that you had here, such as the long second sentence. Just reading it I could feel your exhaustion. Then soon after you had your quick, short sentence, almost as if to say, “No excuses!” Such a powerful way to tell your story.
LikeLike
You are all so kind. Thank you.
I wrote that first paragraph with a smile. I remembered a SI article I read by Rick Reilly years ago. Almost the entire article was a single sentence. I’ve been waiting to use that technique & realized this slice was the perfect place for the on and on and on nature of the sentence. I had fun with that really long sentence in my first paragraph.
LikeLike
ooohhh! Oh I love this: I’m addicted to the rush of mashing words together in powerful ways.
LikeLike
My crazy cousin accused me of being in love with words. I confessed!! Isn’t it strange???? “Mashing words together” says it all. Thank you for being there for us as writers!
LikeLike
I’m sitting at my kitchen table, commenting on a stack of drafts, feeling pretty weary. As a reward, I check Google Reader. I see this post. Yes, yes, yes — we must write, in the same way a marathoner must put in the lonely miles. But I feel depleted sometime by working on the words of others. And then I get to your last line:
“I will write for me. (I’ll revise for others.)”
It is like sunshine, like a new mantra. It speaks volumes to me.
And, in writing for you, you wrote for me. That, too, is important to remember, as writers.
LikeLike
I’m cheering for you as you run for the days finish line! Your determination inspires me to be determined too.
LikeLike
Dittto Linda’s and The Other Ruth’s comments. Bravo to you, even though probably all you wanted to do was less “talking” and go find a place to rest.
We’ll rest on the 1st of April?
Thanks for all you do–
E.
LikeLike
Thanks for responding to me in my moment of need. This post is very encouraging. The writing challenge has given me the excuse to write, the excuse I want. Today, my family is excusing me from some cleaning, some laundry, even some cooking to get some writing done. I love Christy’s comment above. You do model. Thanks for being my mentor.
LikeLike
Wow. Powerful stuff. You are a busy busy lady. I will think of this post whenever I feel tired and too busy to write. It is a reality check. Thanks!
LikeLike
You continuously model what it means to be a writer in the realest of ways. I am astounded by the raw truth in your words and then softened by the final admission in parentheses. Keep at it! You deserve it. I have to admit I am a bit relieved to hear that thinking of the “other slicers” helped to nudge you forward when needed, because you surely push us forward!
LikeLike
Thank you, Ruth, both for the slice and the challenge. It is the motivation I need this morning.
LikeLike
You continue to amaze me with all you manage to do, and you inspire me because even though you are crazy busy, you still write. Every day.
When I decided to try the challenge this year, I honestly wasn’t sure I’d stick. But like several others who have mentioned it in their slices, I am finding that I cannot finish my day unless I have sliced. You have led the way for us to make this commitment to not only writing, but to ourselves.
LikeLike
Sometimes when we are tired and just don’t want to is the best time to write. Then it is really for the truth of it, not the fantasy of it. Thank you for sharing even in exhaustion!
LikeLike
This is exactly why I write too even though my days are much like yours: teaching by day, running a household, raising kids, studying and running a small business.
People keep asking me why I do so much. I simply say how could I not?
I love it.
LikeLike
I have read almost all the slices today, because I could take the day off & mostly because I enjoyed every word. I can’t do it every day, but wanted to tell you that this writing thing is a good thing & you do sound tired, but the fact that you have continued, even though tired is quite inspiring. Congratulations on this ‘thing’ you’ve started, & thank you!
LikeLike